Chapter 133
-ROMAN-
I was pissed at myself.
I had sworn I would never lose control. Never give in. Ethan’s sister was a line I was never supposed to cross. A rule I had repeated so many times it should have been imprinted on my body. Then I had followed her upstairs, shut her door, and kissed her like I had been starving for it.
Weak.
That was the word.
Weak.
Kiss me. That was all she had to say. And I had folded like the last years of holding the line had been practice for failing.
I felt like I had just betrayed my best friend.
I also could not deny how fucking good that kiss was.
Kissing her was unlike kissing anyone else. Olivia had the most kissable mouth I had ever touched.
Soft. Open. Those sweet sounds she made when I took more of it. Fuck. I wanted to hear more. I wanted her screaming for me. I wanted my hands back on her breasts and her legs around me and the rest of that room. 1 wanted the wall and the bed and every surface to feel us as one.
I should not have kissed her.
I knew that while I was still doing it. I knew it when her tongue met mine. I knew it when she fisted my shirt and I groaned into her mouth like a man who had never been touched.
I knew it when I put my hands under her top and felt her gasp against my lips. I had still done it. I had still pressed my thigh between hers. I had still gotten hard against her in her own bedroom with her family on the lawn.
I had told Luca to stay away. Then I had put my mouth on her like I was somehow worthy of those lips.
I had to do something to stop her from making another scandal and getting forced to marry a stranger. If William Monroe forced her to marry some random rich man, I would lose it.
I knew that now with a clearness that scared me.
So I had no choice. She and Luca could not happen again. I had to keep her far away from him.
If that meant kissing her again, so be it.
As long as it stayed just kissing.
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The Hockey Captain’s Unwanted Wife
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I stood in the hallway after her door shut and tried to get my body to agree with that rule. It did not. I was hard. I could still taste her. I could still feel the shape of her under my palms-waist, breasts, the back of her thigh when I had lifted her onto her toes.
I dragged a hand down my face and walked downstairs before I went back in and made the rule worthless.
Every step was a fight.
I wanted to turn around. I wanted to lock the door this time. I wanted to finish what I had started until she could not remember Luca’s name or Eden’s.
That desire made me angrier. I was supposed to be the one who held back. I was supposed to be better than a man who used a deal as an excuse to put his tongue in his best friend’s sister’s mouth.
I had asked what it would take, and when she named the one thing I had been denying myself, I had given it to her like I had no spine left.
I watched the family that did not know I had just had Olivia Monroe against a wall, her breasts in my hands.
They would kill me if they knew.
Eden found me. “Where did you go?”
“Bathroom.”
She looked at my mouth like she could see the lie on it. Maybe she could. Maybe I still looked like I just kissed
someone.
Maybe I still looked like a man who had come downstairs with his blood in the wrong direction.
I took a drink I did not want and stood next to Ethan at the grill because that was the punishment I deserved.
“You good?” Ethan asked. “You disappeared.”
“Fine.”
Great friend. His words.
I had just had his sister against a wall. I had had my hands on her breasts. I had been one decision away from taking her clothes off in a house full of Monroes. And he was checking if I needed another beer.
Only if you are the groom. She’d said that to me and it had fucking killed me inside.
The kiss had wrecked me.
It had not been a mistake. It had been the best kiss of my life, and I hated myself for knowing that so fast. Soft mouth. Sweet noises. She even opened for me like she had been waiting years, because she had.
I had felt it. I had taken it. I had wanted more the second I pulled away.
I told myself the deal was strategy.
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Do not call Luca. Do not give William another scandal. Do not watch her walk down an aisle toward some random name while I stood in a PR relationship I did not want.
Kissing her to prevent that was still kissing her.
I wanted to do it again already.
The want made me furious. At her for asking. At myself for answering. At Eden for existing. At Ethan for trusting me. At William for putting marriage on the table so I would have an excuse that sounded almost noble.
It was not noble.
It was weakness with a story attached.
Eden laughed at something Tessa said. I did not hear it. I was still upstairs in that room, Olivia’s back on the wall, her gasp in my mouth when I touched her.
I had pulled away because if I stayed I would have taken her clothes off. I would have put her on that bed. I would have been inside her with the BBQ still going.
Just kissing.
I repeated it until it sounded like a plan.
It was not a plan. It was a crack I had put in the only rule that had been keeping me decent.
Ethan handed me a plate. I took it. I nodded at the right times. I did not look at the stairs.
If she came down with that look on her face-kissed, dazed, mine-I was not sure I would stay on this side of
the yard.
I was not sure I would stay a great friend for the rest of the afternoon. I was not sure I could look Eden in the eye and play her fake boyfriend while my mouth still remembered Olivia’s.
I had kissed Olivia Monroe.
I was going to have to live with that.
I wanted to go back up and apologize and also not apologize. I wanted to tell Ethan the truth and also never tell him. I wanted to send Eden home and also keep the cover that made this look like something other than what it was.
What it was: I had lost.
One closed door. One request. Years of holding back, gone.
And I already knew “just kissing” was the lie I would tell myself the next time she threatened to call Luca, because the alternative, losing her to a scandal or a stranger, felt worse than betraying the man standing next
to me.
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The Hockey Captain’s Unwanted Wife
That should have stopped me.
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It only made me want her more.
I ate food I could not truly enjoy and try to pretend I wasn’t still tasting her in my mouth, and already counting the minutes until I would have a reason to put my mouth on her again.
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14:59 Thu, Sep 17
The Hockey Captain’s Unwanted Wife
Dex Morgan
Dex works to elevate each story with clean writing, emotional balance, and thoughtful flow for readers.