Nash Starting my day with my dad yelling at me to get my ass to school always made things feel brighter. Annoyed, I waited outside the school again, glad that the others had already gone inside. I wasn’t in the mood to re cap last night. Ryker had been furious with Coach D when I dropped him off at home. That wasn’t going to have made for a pleasant workout this morning in the field house. They’d all have been tired from their early morning and pissed because they had to be there. I hadn’t climbed out of my vehicle yet when I saw a white Honda Civic pull up and park a few spots down. That was Tallulah’s car and her parking spot. She’d been assigned it last year when she got her car. I suddenly had an interest in getting out and going inside. By the time she was hurrying for the door, I had gotten close enough to catch up to her. Although I couldn’t walk fast. I was closer to the entrance. “You’re late,” I said, just to get her attention. She paused and turned to me. She’d been in such a hurry she hadn’t noticed me until then. “Yeah and so are you,” she r eplied. “I’ve got a limp. Slows me down,” I lied. I had simply not wanted to get out of bed this morning. “Not that I have to explain myself to you, but my mother forgot about a cake she’d put in the oven, it caught on fire, and we had to put it out and get the smoke out of the house.”
Okay her reason was more interesting. “Seriously?” I asked. Tallulah rolled her eyes. “I wouldn’t make that up.” Her dislike for me was getting to me, but that response made me laugh. It felt good to laugh. “Sounds like a fun morning.” She smirked as if she wanted to smile but wasn’t going to. Not for me at least. “I smell like a fire. Not exactly thrilling.” She may have smelled like smoke, but she looked amazing. No makeup, her hair pulled up in a messy knot on her head, and she still stood out. Hard to miss. “Might ke ep the guys back so you can breathe today,” I told her, knowing that wouldn’t be the case. “I guess I should consider that my silver lining,” she snapped, annoyed. She was enjoying this. She didn’t want to enjoy it. That much was obvious. I didn’t want her to hate me, but damn if it wasn’t fun to hear her smart-ass comments. She was confident now. More sure of herself. The change in her was appealing. She had once tried to hide from the world. Blend in and hope no one noticed her. Now she held her head high and didn’t back down. It was hard to walk away from, and I didn’t want her to dislike me. Knowing I’d hurt her bothered me. As much fun as it was to see her roll her eyes at me and give me that annoyed smirk, I had to fix what I’d done. Or at least do the decent thing and apologize. She deserved that. “I’m sorry.” Even as I said it, I knew that words were weak, considering my actions.
Her confident smirk faded, and a confused frown took its place. She wasn’t sure why I was apologizing. But I could see her mind working through it. I had to do better than just say I was sorry. She deserved more. An explanation. “Last night I was reminded of something. Something I’m not proud of. Something I regret.” Understanding dawned in her gaze. She knew exactly what I had done. It was why she’d been so angry with me. It had hurt her. My chest squeezed tighter, wishing I hadn’t been so flippant. So careless. That moment I hadn’t remembered had stuck with her. “I wasn’t really listening to Ryker that day. My head was elsewhere. I didn’t think about it. I just reacted to his laughter with my own. It was thoughtless, cruel, and selfish. I should have said something to him, not just laughed. I was wrong. And I am sorry. I’m sorry for laughing. I’m sorry for not even remembering it happened. For being so damn wrapped up in my little world that I was blind to the others around me. How I was affecting them.” I stopped. Saw her eyes soften. “How I was affecting you. I hurt you. I’ll regret it forever. Please forgive me.” She didn’t say anything right away. Instead she turned her head to stare off in another direction. I didn’t push or say more. I let her process what I’d said. Decide if it was enough. If I was worth the forgiveness. When she finally turned her head back to me, she gave me a small smile. Not the bright kind that I realized I’d once looked forward to. But one that was sincere in its own way.
“You remember now, huh? Took you some time.” Her words were laced with pain. “I was an asshole. So was Ryker,” I told her, wishing I could do more than just apologize. “I’d never hated anyone before then. You were my first taste at hating someone. That hate drove me to walk every day. When I would have rather eaten a big piece of cake and read a book instead, I got up and walked because of you. I’d always d epended on you to stand up for me. Speak to me. Notice me. I’d put you on some pedestal as perfect. Heroic. Truth was you were just a nice guy. Nothing more. You reacted the way the others always did, and it was crushing. But it changed me. I had the drive to lose the weight. Get healthier. I enjoy exercise now. And if you hadn’t laughed, I’d still be that girl. I’ve spent months bitter, angry, bent on revenge. But now... I don’t feel any of that. Seeing you and realizing I let your actions have so much power over me was my fault. I shouldn’t have given you that power. Thanks for the apology, but it’s irrelevant now and a little late.” There was no softness, no forgiveness in her voice. Knowing my laughter had affected her like that made me feel even worse. “Is that what you were talking about yesterday? Why you started walking?” A simple nod of her head confirmed what I’d already figured out. “I wish your hurt because of my actions hadn’t been why you did it.” She lifted a corner of her mouth as if that amused her. “Hate, Nash. It was hate.” Although she wanted me to believe she no longer cared, that she had moved on and forgotten it, the tone of her voice told me otherwise. She may not have hated me anymore, but
she didn’t like me. And I wanted to fix that. Not just to ease my guilt, but because I wanted to get to know the girl she’d become. The late bell rang, and we heard it echo outside. “Now we’re really late,” she said, trying not to look worried. I shrugged. Not a big deal. “We won’t miss much.” “Maybe, but I’m never late.” “Never hurts to try something new,” I r eplied. Tallulah shot me an annoyed glare. “Yeah, well, that road isn’t one I plan on going down. I’ll try new things that don’t affect my grades and college acc eptance letters.” Jesus she was serious. And it was sexy as hell. “Lighten up, girl. It’s just one tardy.” Tallulah rolled her eyes at me yet again and hurried on toward the entrance. I watched her go, enjoying the view in those shorts she was wearing. I followed behind her, slower simply because I couldn’t move that fast anymore. The office would only let me be late so many times before they stopped being understanding. She was fast, because when I got to the office, Tallulah was already gone. Mrs. Murphy was too busy getting everyone checked in to have a tardy slip pr epared for me already. There were three other people in front of me. That was odd. No one else was outside. They had to have been here before she got in here. How had she gotten her tardy slip and already gone to class? I glanced around to see if she was anywhere, but nothing. When it was my turn to sign in, I noticed her name wasn’t on the tardy sheet. “Tallulah Liddell just came in. Did she not
check in?” I asked Mrs. Murphy. She slid my slip across the counter to me. “She did come in, but Mr. Dace was in the hallway and said he had her excuse. She’d been helping him with something. Now don’t make this tardy thing a habit, Nash.” Then she turned to the student behind me. Coach D again... I didn’t trust that man.